Day 366: One year on

A year ago my life changed forever with my diagnosis. I remember sitting in Dr. Karen's office clutching Swoops, Remie's Beanie Boo and our "medical owl". I remember hearing that I had cancer, and hearing her talk briefly about DCIS. I sort of understood what she way saying as I'd done a bit of research after her office had rung me the day before and said that she wanted to see me, which I knew wasn't good news 4 days after my biopsy.  I remember it all seeming a bit far away. Poor Nick received broken texts from me and, working out that the news wasn't good, beat me home.  I sobbed on his shoulder and to Sandy on the phone. I rang Alison to find out more about Lisa's experience.  Then the afternoon progressed as normal and Steph and I drank a bottle of wine each and talked about the path to come while Nick was out.  Thankfully we didn't know the half of it.

I can honestly say that, despite all the challenges, I've gotten more out of the past year than I've lost:
1. I've learned that my family can help one another to get through a series of very scary and unpleasant situations. We can cuddle and listen when one of us is sad or frightened and still laugh and enjoy life.
2. I truly understand that my husband would do anything for me. Although he may not be the best communicator or great with emotions, he demonstrated his phenomenal caring and concern when I needed it most.
3. I've found that I have an amazingly supportive community who are happy to go out of their way to help.
4. I realised that my "little sister", with whom I don't always see eye-to-eye, is truly one of the most caring and thoughtful people I know. She provided the most unbelievable support from across the world in the form of daily check-in texts and general words and gifts.
5. I appreciate that the bonds I have with friends and family who live around the world can provide strength across physical distance. Through reconnecting with old friends and family I have felt more grounded.
6.  I've gained an invaluable perspective on all sorts of things. I understand that health and love are more important than anything else. I don't sweat the small stuff when I can help it (I'm still human).
7. I discovered an amazing well of strength within myself. I now feel confidant that I can tackle most anything.
8.  I cemented my life-long belief that "it's not what happens; it's how you respond to it".
9. I remember that it's not what I am on the outside that counts; it's who I am on the inside that matters.
10. I am aware that my time on this planet has an end date and I need to try to enjoy every day and make it count.

I'm glad to be out of the treatment tunnel and sad to be in the lymphoedema one, but despite this diversion, I hope the scary stuff has passed. Time will tell.

In other news, I had a lovely "spa day" at Mt. Wilga consisting of gym (physio), pool (hydro therapy), and massage (followed by bandaging). My arm has gone down about 25%, so fingers crossed the reduction continues and then stays.